What can I say about 2012 without sounding like an ungrateful person? It's sort of impossible when I am a pessimist. I know there are some good things, but the bad things always outweighs the good. I guess it is to keep me grounded.
I'm still pursuing my studies, and I have been getting great grades so far. Next semester will probably be my last semester at NWACC. I'm scared to move on to the university, but it's just something I have to do. I am still not sure what career I am going to pursue in the future though, which sucks, a lot. I miss my family in Malaysia a lot.
I miss my abah a lot. I wish he was alive to see that I am not a screw up. I wish he was alive to see me graduate. I wish he was alive to see everything I will achieve in the future.
I did a countdown of eleven good things that happen in 2011 when 2012 was coming, but honestly, I don't think I can come up with twelve things that highlight the year 2012. Should I even try, or just put up some new years resolution? Honestly, I can't think of anything that I want to resolve. What I want is impossible, because it is in someone else's hands.
2013, I'm begging you, please be good to me.
Monday, December 31, 2012
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Messed Up!
Haven't done blogging in a way long time. Today, however, I feel like writing about it. Although this might be personal, I just don't have anyone to talk to about it without being judged. I feel like I'm the most messed up human being in this whole entire planet! There are reasons to my statement:
1. I don't have a clear vision of what I want to pursue as a career. In other words, I am not sure of what I am passionate about.
2. I have NO hobbies! I hate when people ask me "What do you like to do,?" " What are your hobbies?" Like seriously, I do not have a hobby. I WANT a hobby, but I don't know what I can do. I am not creative, therefore I cannot do arts and crafty things. I mean, I want to be creative. I want to do creative stuff, but I know I'll just fail. I need to find a hobby. Something that will relax me. I can't even do sports hobby stuff. I'm not athletic. I'm also one of the most sports retarded person in the world. Even if I do have a hobby, I'll probably won't have time to do it. With all the assignments and quizzes and classes and trying to not make more of a mess in the apartment, I'm booked! I just want to find something. I need something that is mine. Mine only. Something that I don't have to worry about good grades, losing , sharing, or being stupid.
Passion. What am I passionate about?
1. I don't have a clear vision of what I want to pursue as a career. In other words, I am not sure of what I am passionate about.
2. I have NO hobbies! I hate when people ask me "What do you like to do,?" " What are your hobbies?" Like seriously, I do not have a hobby. I WANT a hobby, but I don't know what I can do. I am not creative, therefore I cannot do arts and crafty things. I mean, I want to be creative. I want to do creative stuff, but I know I'll just fail. I need to find a hobby. Something that will relax me. I can't even do sports hobby stuff. I'm not athletic. I'm also one of the most sports retarded person in the world. Even if I do have a hobby, I'll probably won't have time to do it. With all the assignments and quizzes and classes and trying to not make more of a mess in the apartment, I'm booked! I just want to find something. I need something that is mine. Mine only. Something that I don't have to worry about good grades, losing , sharing, or being stupid.
Passion. What am I passionate about?
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